Fire! Ready, aim …
By BRUCE LOWITT With the firing Friday of recently appointed White House Press Secretary Katie Zacharia after only five days on the job, President Donald Trump has instituted a new policy for all political appointees – providing resignation letters when they get the job in order to speed up their departure, and hinting he had…
A Washington Defective Story
By BRUCE LOWITT Defects have been discovered not only in the Lincoln Memorial Reflecting Pool, but also in President Donald Trump’s proposed Triumphal Arch and the White House presidential master suite, as well as the ballroom under construction. “Vandalism. It’s all due to Dumocrat socialists and communists,” Trump roared when told that the reflecting pool…
It was all Greek to her – briefly
By BRUCE LOWITT (Transcript of a meeting involving self-disgracing then-ambassador to Greece Kimberly Guilfoyle, Secretary of State Marco Rubio, Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth, Attorney General Todd Blanche, U.S. Trade Representative Jamieson Greer, Guilfoyle lawyer David Schwartz, and Greece Foreign Minister Giorgos Gerapetritis. The recording was made by Greek film director Yorgos Lanthimos, who said…
Norway still says ‘No way’
By BRUCE LOWITT President Donald Trump said he is buying the Nobel Peace Prize, will replace the members of the Norwegian Nobel Committee with the Kennedy Center Board of Trustees and award it to himself “and if Norway doesn’t want to sell it, they’d better take to their air raid shelters, if they have any.”…
Trump: Xi’s the Bee’s Knees
By BRUCE LOWITT If President Donald Trump had anything to be happy about following his three-day summit and pajama party with Chinese counterpart Xi Jinping it was the “She still wants to sleep with you” fortune cookie he opened at the White House’s concluding state dinner.But the befuddled American president disrupted the dignified proceedings by…
Zelenskyy: Trump came and went
By BRUCE LOWITTUkraine President Volodymyr Zelenskyy urged the world’s leaders at the United Nations to “start choking Russian President Vladimir Putin,” saying he was misquoted, that he didn’t say they should try to choke Russia’s revenues these days “because that wouldn’t do Jack shit.” Before his speech to the General Assembly he met met with…
Here a ‘chick, there a ‘chick …
By BRUCE LOWITT An enormous student rally, with a bonfire at Kenan Memorial Stadium and a celebratory parade along Franklin Street from the University of North Carolina campus to downtown Chapel Hill, was cut short Saturday when it turned out Bill Belichick hadn’t resigned as the Tar Heels’ head football coach. To the dismay of…
If the suit fits …
By BRUCE LOWITTMar-a-Lago, President Donald Trump’s feloniously famous home, poses “imminent life-safety risks,” should be shut down and could be torn down, according to a statement from the Town of Palm Beach’s Code Enforcement Board. Coincidentally (or not), the New York City Council met to determine whether Trump Tower in Manhattan requires demolition or should…
“Do you take this …? Of course you do”
By BRUCE LOWITT ProPublica has disclosed that not only did Russian oligarch Umar Kremlev bankroll the wedding afterparty in May of Donald Trump Jr. and socialite Bettina Anderson in the Bahamas, he also paid for the bat mitzvah two years ago of Arabella Rose Kushner, daughter of Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump. Kremlev, head of…
Nine-Something, he thinks
By BRUCE LOWITT (Partial transcript of a session with President Donald Trump conducted by Dr. Verruckt Wahnsinnig, a psychiatrist at the Lacherlich Institute, a private hospital in suburban Washington, D.C. The session was requested – and the resulting recording was purloined – by a person known only as The Human Printer.)VW: “So why don’t we…
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