Category Archives: Uncategorized

By BRUCE LOWITT Transcript of the actual inaugural speech by President Donald Trump following his swearing-in on Monday. The speech that was televised and broadcast was a substitute AI version provided by White House technical services. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you. Thank you. Yes, thank you. (Applause diesContinue reading “Trump: Me, me, me. Also me.”

By BRUCE LOWITT Transcript of a conversation at Mar-a-Lago involving President-elect Donald Trump, soon-to-be deputy chief of staff to President Trump Stephen Miller, former House Speaker Newt Gingrich, and Trump campaign speechwriters Vince Haley and Ross Worthington. The recording was provided by a former Mar-a-Lago employee who insisted on total anonymity because he also helpedContinue reading “Next: even more Trump fantasies”

By BRUCE LOWITT New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft admitted Wednesday he regretted allowing Bill Belichick to leave the team after the 2023 NFL season and said he fired head coach Jerod Mayo as a first step to getting Belichick back. He also said he should have fired de facto general manager Eliot Wolf asContinue reading “Kraft says this Bill is due”

By BRUCE LOWITT President-elect Donald Trump said that as soon as the United States takes control of Greenland he will rename it “Redwhiteandblueland.” But Queen Margrethe II of Denmark, which controls Greenland, replied that “If Trump lays a finger on it, we and the rest of NATO will consider it an act of war andContinue reading “Trump: Green with envy”

By BRUCE LOWITT In a follow-up to his commuting the death sentences of 37 death-row prisoners, President Joe Biden issued an executive order declaring Matt Gaetz guilty of multiple felonies and sentencing the former Florida congressman to life in prison without the possibility of parole, conjugal visits, or premium toiletries.The first presidential commutation of aContinue reading “The Gates of Hell Open for Gaetz”

By BRUCE LOWITT After the House Ethics Committee secretly voted to release its long-awaited report on former Rep. Matt Gaetz, Senate Republicans also secretly voted to investigate virtually all of President-elect Donald Trump’s other nominees for cabinet positions, ambassadorships, and governmental offices. The impetus for the probe, according to several Republican senators, all of whomContinue reading “Outing the inbred”

By BRUCE LOWITT Bill Belichick resigned Tuesday as University of North Carolina head football coach after the former New England Patriots coach and six-time Super Bowl winner, who signed a $50-million five-year contract with UNC last Thursday, said he “realized what a historically bad load of crap I would have been getting myself into.” Belichick,Continue reading “Belichick chickens out”

By BRUCE LOWITT An attorney and advisor for Secretary of Health and Human Services nominee Robert F. Kennedy Jr. says being a major shareholder in companies that manufacture iron lungs and leg braces is in no way connected to his petition asking the federal government to revoke its approval of the polio vaccine. “Claims thatContinue reading ““Hey, Siri, what’s the definition of ‘contagious’?””

By BRUCE LOWITT The convergence Thursday of Donald Trump ringing the opening bell at the New York Stock Exchange within minutes of the President-elect being named Time Magazine’s Person of the Year resulted in a 49.73 percent decrease in the Dow Jones Industrial Average and worldwide chaos.The 21,838.92-point crash, more than double the previous largestContinue reading “This TIME, it couldn’t be worse”

By BRUCE LOWITT President Joe Biden, having already gone back on his word by pardoning his son, Hunter, of any misdeeds, issued blanket pardons Wednesday “to all Democrats – and maybe a select few Republicans – in Congress, as well as in other federal, state, and local offices or anywhere else for anything they haveContinue reading “Pardon Me? Him? Her? Them? …”