Bad Girls

A Bonus Lowittlowdown

By BRUCE LOWITT

(A Partial transcript of the 8 p.m. meeting of the House Oversight Committee meeting on Thursday evening, postponed from 11 a.m. due to too many of the Republican committee members attending former President Donald Trump’s hush-money trial in New York. The meeting, chaired by Rep. James Comer, R-Ky., was called to advance a GOP plan to hold U.S. Attorney General Merrick Garland in contempt fror refusing to produce recordings of President Joe Biden’s interview with Special Counsel Robert Hur.)

Rep. Jasmine Crockett, D-Tex.: “Do you know what we’re here for?”

Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene, R-Ga.: “I don’t think you know what you’re here for. I think your fake eyelashes are messing up what you’re reading.”

Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, D-NY: “That is absolutely unacceptable, how dare you attack the physical appearance of another person.”

Greene: “Are your feelings hurt?”

Ocasio-Cortez: “Oh girl, baby girl, don’t even play with me.”

Greene: “Oh really? Baby girl? I don’t think so. … Why don’t you debate me?”

Ocasio-Cortez: “I think it’s pretty self-evident.”

Greene: “Yeah, you don’t have enough intelligence.”

(Comer rejects calls to have committee members’ comments removed from the record.)

Crockett: “I’m just curious. To better understand your ruling, if someone on this committee then starts talking about somebody’s bleached-blonde, bad-built, butch body, that would not be engaging in personalities, correct?”

Anna Paulina Luna, R-Fla.: “We’re not gonna do this.”

Crockett: “I’m trying to get clarification!”

Luna: “Calm down. Calm down.”

Crockett: “No, no, no! Because this is what y’all do. So, I’m trying to get clarification because y’all wanna play games …”

Luna: “I can’t hear you with your yelling.”

Crockett: “… and you don’t want to …”

Luna: “Calm down.”

Crockett: “No! Don’t tell me to calm down because y’all talk noise and then you can’t take it!”

Luna: “You’re outta control.”

Crockett: “Because if I come and talk shit about her, y’all gonna have a problem!”

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Later, Crockett and Greene posted comments on the social media site X:

Crockett: “So MTG wanted to talk about my appearance in COMMITTEE?! It’s against the rules to do… She refused to apologize! The chairman ruled that it was ok… AND I asked for clarification about what qualifies as ‘engaging in personalities’ & basically wanted to know if I could talk shit about her appearance as… well… y’all know what she looks like, right? PEOPLE IN GLASS HOUSES! This is what happens when mentally deficient people who can’t read and follow rules or just don’t give a damn… somehow end up in CONGRESS!”

Greene: “Democrats can’t stop attacking President Trump even after wasting millions of taxpayer dollars on their sham J6 Committee.”

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AUTHOR’S NOTE: Unlike the usual created-by-the-author satirical Lowdowns whose byline is at the top of this column, these are the actual word-for-word comments by members of your United States government representatives. Have a nice day.